JANE:Sex is the price women pay for marriage. Marriage is the price men pay for sex. Allan & Barbara Pease Steven:Unless of course you are a man in a sexless marriage, in which case it must just be love. JANE: Men often complain about sexless marriages. Yet Kinsey concluded that married men get more sex ON AVERAGE than single men. In other words, men always have to romance a woman. JANE (cont): Or they have to pay, of course, which is sometimes simpler with a guaranteed result! I don’t expect men to understand. I am trying to help them understand that the problem is universal. It’s not personal. Steven: Absolutely Jane I dont think its personal for a moment, and your articles are indeed informative and very helpful. In essence I agree that men do indeed marry for sex. Steven (cont): The fact that Ive been married for 30+ years and we have been sexless for the last 12 years doesnt change things, I wouldnt dream of walking away simply because theres no sex. JANE:I have found few women who understand sexual response. They have no experience of erotic arousal. So they have no way of understanding JANE (cont): the importance of sexual love to men. Likewise, men do not understand women’s need for platonic love affection, listening & caring behaviours. Steven: I miss our previous life and it hurts but she has little to no desire anymore. I have I think regretfully just come to accept its not going to change. Slowly Im learning to ignore the pain and hurt it produces in me and let go of Steven (cont): the resentment though its not easy at times. Truly I dont think she ever understood how important sex is to a man and I can honestly say I can never recall her ever initiating sex. Steven (cont): For a young man, especially a virgin, sex is everything. For the young man, in his late teens and twenties, sex is revelled in. You rejoice in the quantity, the triumphs and you never want it to end or believe it ever will. Steven (cont): The man in his 30s and 40s finally sees that quality replaces quantity. Emotions mean so much more. You never think it will end. You never want to acknowledge that possibility. For a man, at whatever age Steven (cont): it happens, they will never say they had too much sex or even enough. They may replace the loss with hobbies, shut up in a shed, sitting on a riverbank, or polishing a car. But whatever it is, it cannot replace that which has gone. Dedicated to womens enjoyment of sexual pleasure