Nontokozo: Women can also view men as sex objects. JANE: Women do not have the same ability (that men have) to view a person as an object of sexual desire. Women always see people as social or emotional beings. This explains why women are not aroused with a lover. Nontokozo: Oh but I do! There are some men that I look at and immediately get aroused. JANE: These are romantic & emotional sensations. Women do not pay for sex, porn or lapdancing bars as men do. Men want sex with someone regardless of any relationship. Women may enjoy looking but they usually want to know someone before having sex. Nontokozo: Not all women. I and some of my friends aren’t the typical woman you have just described. We don’t need to be in a relationship to have sex with a person. We don’t need an emotional entanglement to get aroused either. JANE: Well, given women are not aroused with a lover, the only reason for women to engage in casual sex is ego, money, vanity or just to be popular with men. Women are sexually passive due to lack of arousal. The only proactive female role is facilitating male orgasm. Nontokozo: How will that ‘lack of arousal’ be corrected? Is that something that men do not execute correctly? JANE: Women are not aroused with a lover. They accept intercourse (the mating act) because they are not intent on achieving their own orgasm. Intercourse facilitates male arousal & orgasm, which triggers ejaculation. But it has nothing to do with achieving female orgasm. Nontokozo: I’ve seen how excited a guy gets when he finds me wet already before even touching me, that’s why some prefer a woman to masturbate while he watches. JANE: That is not masturbation to orgasm. That is just a display that arouses men. Vaginal lubrication is a response to the body preparing for intercourse, which has nothing to do with female orgasm. Research indicates that women orgasm alone. Nontokozo: Why would women orgasm alone? JANE: The function of female orgasm is a woman’s pleasure. It has nothing to do with pleasing a man or satisfying male ego. The research clearly associates female orgasm with clitoral stimulation & women’s solitary masturbatory activities. Nontokozo: Your reasons for casual sex are wrong. Not all women have casual sex because of the above reasons. Some are single and horny therefore just need a fix and move on with life. JANE: What does horny mean exactly given intercourse has nothing to do with achieving female orgasm? Are you just trying to get pregnant? That is a desire for family. Nontokozo: Horny means wanting to having intercourse. Sometimes a woman may not want to self pleasure but want to have sex with another human. JANE: Yes but this is an emotional response to give pleasure & to enjoy feeling desired by a man. Few women volunteer for intercourse without using reliable contraceptive. This is why women prefer a relationship before offering sex. Nontokozo: This is not always the case. Women can have sex and orgasm without having any form of emotional attachment to the person they are having sex with. JANE: What anatomy are you stimulating? What turnons do you use to get mentally aroused? Nontokozo : (silence) Celebrating our ability to enjoy eroticism