JANE: Why do men not define their own sexual response? Orgasm is a response to eroticism. It occurs when a person who is mentally aroused by erotic stimuli decides to obtain the stimulation that they know instinctively will allow them to release their accumulated arousal. JANE (cont): Orgasm is not related to a relationship, love or romance. It is not a vague feeling of wellbeing. Orgasm is a highly specific experience that is repeatable and that is associated with conscious actions that a person undertakes to enjoy the pleasures of arousal and sexual release. Vivian: Orgasm is a physiological response that does not require erotic pleasure, connection, or arousal. I think your view could be problematic for certain populations when stated as fact. Victims of sexual assault who experience orgasm during the attack often report feeling as if their body betrayed them or that there is something seriously wrong with them. Vivian (cont): In addition, there are myriad negative emotions, selfimage issues, and mental health impacts. The likelihood is that at least 1 in every 4 women who read this have experienced some form of sexual assault. That said, there are a lot of variations in what works for whom and when, and I don’t know if we could find a specieswide consensus on it. JANE: You may define orgasm in terms of sexual assault but that is not the usual scenario for enjoying sexual pleasure. Orgasm is a consequence of how the brain responds to eroticism. But the male brain responds to many more erotic stimuli than the female brain. JANE (cont): As a woman, it is likely that you have never had an orgasm or ever been aroused. Most women associate sex with emotional rewards But men look for erotic stimuli to enjoy their own arousal and ultimately sexual release through penile stimulation. JANE (cont): The ignorance that surrounds our understanding of how women orgasm is due to the rarity of it and the many false claims that are made by men or by women who are sexually ignorant. This is a scientific forum and any assertions need to be backed by facts, explanations and research. Vivian: My response included facts and logical explanations to expand on your discussion. Your assumptions about my personal orgasm ability are not only wrong, but uncalled for in a professional discussion. JANE: I have made no comment on your ability but only your definition. To comment on sexual response, you must have some relevant experience and be informed about the scientific conclusions that have been drawn. You appear to have neither. Men will tell you that orgasm is most definitely associated with eroticism and with sexual pleasure. JANE (cont): Given orgasm is a vital characteristic of male reproductive function, the male experience is likely to be the base line for considering a female sexual response. Sexologists have accepted any and every account of pelvic spasms a woman cares to promote and labelled these as orgasm. This is due to the rarity of the real thing. JANE (cont): Women insist on being considered the equals of men in all things even sexual response. But this is like men demanding to have babies. We have two sexes for a reason they are different. If they were the same there would be no point in having two sexes. Sexual reproduction involves a passive female part and a proactive male part even in plants. Political objectives stand in the way of scientific understanding. Celebrating our ability to enjoy eroticism