Men are easily aroused because their minds frequently focus on sexual opportunities. Nudity (especially genitals) triggers the male brain to anticipate a potential opportunity for intercourse. Women’s minds are not naturally aroused so they do not respond easily to physical stimulation.[i]
Misconception #2: Because of the male experience, it is incorrectly assumed that women are aroused by genitals and intercourse. Women have no reason to be permanently aroused and capable of stimulating themselves to orgasm. Equally women have no need to be aroused by nudity.
We can deduce male turn-ons from pornography and prostitution, which (because men pay) are evidently aimed at male gratification. But given the lack of female equivalents it is difficult to deduce how women enjoy sexual gratification as opposed to lovemaking within a relationship.
Some women claim to be aroused by sexual activity. Yet women tend to be at best indifferent to pornography, which is a visual portrayal of sex. Many women are offended by explicitly sexual scenes. Everything about sex (hairy skin, earthy smells and body fluids) is unappealing to women. Women’s use of fantasies softens the graphic impact of sexual activity.
Some men enjoy watching women stimulating each other because they find such images a turn-on. If women responded in the same way then they would be just as fascinated to observe male masturbation and male homosexual erotica for its portrayal of the male genitalia and responses.
Some women claim to be aroused by a lover’s genitals. But if all women were aroused by a lover’s genitals they would buy porn as men do. Also more men would display their bodies provocatively as a female turn-on.
Female modesty comes from realising that men are aroused by nudity. So men can urinate by the side of the road without causing a traffic accident but it would be a very different story if a woman tried to do the same. Nudity (especially a display of genitals) is so suggestive to many men that they interpret any public display of nudity as a sexual invitation.
Men assume that women are aroused (to the point of orgasm) by the prospect of sexual activity and consequently that they respond to physical stimulation. Women never reach a state where orgasm becomes inevitable (even alone). Neither do they ever experience the need to resolve a state of mental arousal or the physical tension of an erection as orgasm.
[i] The average male is aroused in anticipation of a sexual relationship, and he usually … is ready to proceed directly to orgasm as soon as or even before he makes any actual contact. The average female, on the contrary, is less often aroused by such anticipation, and sometimes she does not begin to respond until there has been a considerable amount of physical stimulation. (p627 Kinsey 1953)
Excerpt from Jane’s book Women’s Sexual Behaviours & Responses (2013)