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Women’s sexuality

The sexual responses of arousal and orgasm arise subconsciously. But sexual behaviours involve more conscious decisions: we choose how we will explore and enjoy our interaction with a lover.

Women assume they should orgasm with a lover

Prostitutes are more experienced than most women. Yet even they admit that they do not orgasm with clients.[i] A woman who claims to orgasm with a lover is either interpreting orgasm in emotional terms or she is using orgasm as a reward for her lover’s commitment to the relationship. Heterosexual men have difficulty identifying with…

Intercourse is a demonstration of male virility

Although prostitutes the world over pleasure men, none are called ‘great lovers’. Equally a man does not ‘make love’ to a prostitute. Male lovemaking is a behaviour used to persuade a woman to accept intercourse.[i] Men want a lover to be motivated to engage in intercourse so they focus on women’s responses to lovemaking. Men…

Women’s use of fantasy makes orgasm easier alone

Men may be spontaneously aroused but most men most of the time need to do something to orgasm. So female orgasms cannot ‘just happen’. The emphasis on clitoral stimulation (as if it is the only factor in orgasm) is misleading because it ignores the bigger issue of erotic turn-ons.[i] Stimulation techniques are useless without accompanying…

Women only need to be amenable to intercourse

Samples based on volunteers will always attract people whose sexual (or political) motivation is well above the average for the general population. Women, who divulge their sexual histories, are either confident that orgasm is not possible with a lover or they are pleased to display their sexual prowess by claiming experiences that are considered ‘normal’.…

Men want sex more than is required for reproduction

Most men are tempted by any sexual opportunity. Some women say that sex is orgasmic but they do not initiate sex more than other women.[i] The modern assertion that women are capable of rape indicates the lack of understanding of the nature of male sex drive and of intercourse as a mating act initiated by…

Women do not masturbate as a substitute for intercourse

Male responsiveness gradually declines from adolescence onwards so that few men masturbate regularly by the age of 50. But at any age most men only masturbate if there is no chance of sexual activity with a lover. It is a subtle point but masturbation clearly fulfils quite different functions for men and women. Male masturbation…

Women take on all the key risks of intercourse

Research indicates that almost all men are sexually active throughout their lives regardless of whether they are in a relationship. Women in relationships, in addition to never or rarely masturbating, for the most part engage in sexual activity initiated by their partner. Single women do not have intercourse as often[i] or with as many partners…